Warm Memories

A friend, Tisra (found at http://lifetrain.blogspot.com), is in process of adopting from the same orphanage we did and it stirred up wonderful warm, fuzzy memories for me.  You know the kind, where you think of them and they fill your soul with goodness.  Like a good cup of hot cocoa, or a favorite pair of slippers, the memories warm you head to toe and are sweet to boot!

Sunita Ruth has been with us for over 2 months now, and I’m so thankful she is in her forever family.  I feel like I have been using that word, thankful, A LOT lately.  And I’m thankful for that too.

I realized I had never posted the pictures we got along the way, before Sunita came home with us.  And I have never shared much of our India journey.  So, if you are interested, grab a cup of hot cocoa cause this might be a long post.

First pictures of our darling.

Our very first pictures of her.  She was about 6 months old in these.

She looks so small.  I am sad to have missed this part of her life, but am so glad that we are together now.

About 7 or 8 months old.  I still can’t believe that is her.  To me, that looks like a different baby, but everyone else sees the resemblance.

About 9 months old and that is definitely our baby girl!

At the orphanage, the day we picked her up.  16 days before her first birthday.  She is sitting in her daddy’s arms.  This picture will always tug at my heart.  That is her in body, but not in spirit.  She seemed so broken, so forlorn.  No smiles, no laughter.  Rajeev, our Indian coordinator summed it up, “She’s been in the orphanage, what does she have to smile about?”

These were the first toys we gave her.  Rajeev asked if we had any (of course we did, silly man) and to pick 2 or 3.  We had minutes to make the decision and it felt so hard!  The light-up toy (and it played music) was a hit (and good to have on the airplane ride), the rabbit was not.  We realized much later she had never really felt soft things and really was kind of afraid of the soft, furry objects at our house (including the cats).

The orphanage where she lived was large with nice grounds and a small playground out back.

The kids stood outside the room where we first met Sunita.  They kept peeking in and occasionally would say “momma” with a question in their voice.  I had to dissociate.  I couldn’t take it all in.  I still haven’t.  Sometimes, I still think of those girls and boys and wonder where they are or if they have joined their forever families.  The playroom was especially hard.

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This is the playroom.  There were several adults in the room, but they didn’t seem to interact much with the children.  They kept motioning for me to put Sunita down so she could “play” but I couldn’t let go of her.  The other kids all need so much.  They come up to you and just want to be touched, to be loved.  They tried to climb on our laps or snuggle up to us.  There were so many.  Some were bright and interactive and some had some serious issues.  Some cried, some played, many slept.

This could have been Sunita’s bed.  I don’t know which crib she slept in, or if they each have their own.  They do have mosquito netting for the cribs, and most had sheets over the tarps but not all.

This is feeding time.  Three were in this circle (Sunita isn’t pictured).  The plate has dal (rice and beans with curry) on it which the caretaker mashed up and stuffed in. Round and round the circle she went.

She fell asleep in my arms that day.  (I wish she fell asleep that easily now =D).  Putting her down was the hardest thing I had to do that day.  I was in love and it felt SO RIGHT!  I knew God had answered my prayers to prepare my heart and was hoping He had prepared hers for us too!  I did have to put her down because we had lunch with Rajeev and the social worker who did the paperwork.  The orphanage prepared a lovely meal for us, and without looking at my journal I remember absolutely none of it.  I kept stealing glances at Sunita who was on the bed a little ways away.  The day we got her, is so big in my mind.  Because I have never birthed a child (yet, at least) I don’t know how it differs, BUT I do know this, I was a mother then.  Not by blood or by genes, but by the guiding hand of God and I loved that girl fiercly and do more so with each day.

She’s finding my eyes behind the spectacles.

Dad and her playing ball.

After being home for a month, we have bonded.  At least I think we have.  She has grown so much, and yet it has only been 2 months.  I know we have a long journey to go, but I’m so glad we get to do it together.

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